At the first Con Comm meeting the people asked of me,
"Will we have a Con this year?"
At the second Con Comm meeting the people asked of me,
"When will it be,
And will we have a Con this year?"
At the third Con Comm meeting the people asked of me,
"Where will we hold it,
When will it be,
And will we have a Con this year?"
At the fourth Con Comm meeting the people asked of me,
"Who's the Guest of Honor.......
At the fifth Con Comm meeting the people asked of me,
"How much to attend?.......
At the sixth Con Comm meeting the people asked of me,
"Where is the Con Suite?.......
At the seventh Con Comm meeting the people asked of me,
"What about an Art Room?.......
At the eighth Con Comm meeting the people asked of me,
"Other Guests of Honor?.......
At the ninth Con Comm meeting the people asked of me,
"What's the deal with smoking?.......
At the tenth Con Comm meeting the people asked of me,
"Hey, I want some filking.......
At the eleventh Con Comm meeting the people asked of me,
"Will we have a Games room?.......
At the twelfth Con Comm meeting the people asked of me,
"Will we have some movies?.......
At the thirteenth Con Comm meeting the people asked of me,
"What about some flyers?.......
At the fourteenth Con Comm meeting the people asked of me,
"Who'll host the orgy?
(and who'll bring the oil?
and all the rubber sheets?).........
(chords from "Help!", by The Beatles)
After the Con was over, the people said to me:
"The flyers were misprinted,
All the movies sucked,
The games room was a waste,
The filkers need a tune-up,
Smoking was "an issue",
Who screwed up the Art Room?
The Con Suite was a disaster,
We didn't charge enough,
The G O H was nasty,
The other Guests were picky,
The Hotel tried to screw us,
We picked the wrong weekend,
(At least we had the Orgy! :).......
And will you run the Con again next year?"
Jacob Sommer
March 12, 2000